“Have I rejected You, Lord?”

“How often I’ve ached to embrace you, the way a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you wouldn’t let me.” – Matthew 23:37

So I am learning to seek God’s presence.  Nothing more.  And He is really trying to help me.  How awesome is our God?

I “just happened” across this quote today from Pastor Craig Groeschel.  In his book, “The Christian Atheist,” Groeschel spends a great length of time talking about why many of us struggle with our prayer lives.

“But even when you don’t see the results of your prayers around you, you may still sense God’s loving presence as you grow to know Him.  I’ve learned that any genuine communication to God may or may not change what God does, but your prayer will often change your heart or perspective.  Prayer reminds you that you are not in control and keeps you close to the One who is.”

Keeping me close to the One who is.  That is what God is trying to teach me, I think.  More than wanting to give me whatever I want, He wants to draw me into Himself.  He wants my first attentions on Him, and not so much what is going on around me.

This brings me to a point of of self-reflection.  Have I rejected the best that God could give me, because He hasn’t first given me what I wanted?  Have there been times I have stopped reaching out to Him, because my prayers weren’t being answered? I don’t know why, but that question is very heavy on my heart today.  And if that be the case, what a revelation of superficial faith on my part.

Clearly, this process is going to take some time for me…

For many years I have heard the saying, “Sometimes God calms the storm, and sometimes He calms His child.”  I am  beginning to see a flicker of light and a better understanding of how He wants to bless me in this life.  Though the storms may sometime rage against me, I can have peace in His presence.  I can live without fear or worry.  What a gift.

Almighty Jehovah,

Who am I that You would be mindful of me?  The idea that You want a relationship with me is stretching me a bit.  Who am I, that You would want that?  Forgive me if I have rejected You in any way.  Forgive my self-centeredness in wanting only what I want, while ignoring the beautiful things You try to give me.

Teach me, Lord, to live in Your presence.  Lead me to be aware of You in all circumstances, and may that be enough for me.  

In the name of my Savior I pray,

Amen

If you are interested in reading “The Christian Atheist,” by Craig Groeschel, I highly recommend it.  It is a book that truly makes you think about your day-to-day relationship with God.  You can pick it up at our virtual bookstore at the following link:

http://www.cokesbury.com/forms/ProductDetail.aspx?productGroupName=Liberty+Crossings+UMC+VSL+Recommended+List

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